What Are You, Really?

Have you ever thought about what type of personality you've ever had? Have you ever clicked on online lists 'see if you're a somber introvert or a wild extrovert'? Most importantly, have you ever felt confused when you saw those lists and discovered that you related to both the aspects? 

Since a very long time, I've been struggling to define what I really am. Some people say I'm very talkative, while the others say that I'm rather quiet. Sometimes, I feel like chatting nineteen to the dozens and there are times when I feel like I'm best left alone. 

Strange, isn't it? 

Thus, the other day, I got an idea, why don't I ask people their definitions of what it means to be an introvert/extrovert? 

So, I ended up asking a couple of people. Then, I decided I'll categorize their answers, list them down here and try to come to my own conclusions about it. So here, I've compiled a segregated list of all the types I've discovered so far. I hope you can connect with one of these! 

MY DISCOVERY: 

1. The Exuberant Extroverts

SJ: "Extrovert - I am very open about my life, I make instant friends. You already know that! *insert laugh emoji here * " 

PK: "Hey, I'm an extrovert. I'm an outgoing person, like to make friends, have fun, party, share, enjoy, that's how I am but yes sometimes I love to be in my own space alone and reserved, yes I'm shy but I'm trying hard to make that feeling go. I get attached to people soon."

The two people who said the lines above, dear reader, are some of the most open people I've ever had the luck to come across. Both are highly vibrant individuals who exude an excessive amount of positive energy, to the point that you have no choice but to be open.

The extroverts are usually individuals who are usually highly chatty and spread good vibes all around. To put it bluntly, extremist extroverts are individuals who make sure that the other person ends up spilling out their guts. Their openness, care for attention and overall vibrancy literally forces you (disregarding the fact that you're open or closed) to talk.

Sure, you need to have exuberant extroverts around your life. They are the best examples of stress-busters and they make sure that you end up being all gooey-gooey-happy-happy!

But, like every coin has two sides, being an extremist extrovert isn't easy. Extremist extroverts are highly emotional individuals and they end up getting really hurt if the other person doesn't reciprocate their emotions.

 2. The Inwardly Introverts

SN: "Introvert. Idk just the way I am."

JS: "Introvert because I prefer keeping silent at times. I used to talk a lot when I was around people whom I felt comfortable with. But now I don't even talk much with them."

DV:  I'm a through and through introvert. I have always been bad at socializing and shit. It takes me a lot of time to make friends. I can say from the fact that since school till now my hangout group has not been more than four people... and frankly most of the times I prefer to be by myself. It might to be a number of reasons. I can't fake to be friends to be with people (pretense is not my strongest suit). I value my independence to the core (I find crying my heart to another for every small bruise wimpy) and I have realized that people judge way to quick so instead to getting yourself hurt by others' judgmental eyes it's better to stick to people who actually understand you."  

Now, I am not going to deny that being an introvert is a bad thing.

Let me be honest with you. A lot of people have this misconceived notion that being an introvert is a bad thing. They think just because introverts are a bit more aloof and not too communicative, introverts are 'snooty'.

Trust me, at a point of time, I used to think that too.

But the truth is, introverts are actually a treasure chest of talent. They are people who have so much potential in them and they are wonderful individuals, honestly, once you get into the nitty gritties of their behaviour. I love the way introverts tick, you know. There's a certain sense of discipline in the way they work and what makes them all the more interesting to me is that they are like a mystery to solve. 

(To all the introverts out there, please don't be offended)

I don't want to be rude or offensive or anything, but most of the introverts that I have come across are actually people who were once really highly open individuals but then they ended up closing themselves, because of circumstances. 

However, some of the natural introverts I have come across are some of the wittiest people I've come across and their views are always really thought provoking! 

The most typical quote I've ever come across!

3. The Ambiverts 

Ambiverts, to put it simply, are people who tilt towards both ends. They are individuals who are extroverts on some occasion and are really closed when they want to. To put it poetically, they are like a double-edged sword. 

From my little (ambitiously called) survey, I found out that almost 80 percent of the people I questioned truly, thoroughly categorized themselves as ambiverts. This is why, I'm categorizing the answers that I received into three subcategories: 

3. A. The 'Content With My Awesomeness' Ambiverts

SC: "Ambivert - as I like to be with people occasionally and usually just me and my books are kinda cool. 

CH: "Ambivert coz I love being surrounded by people but then again I need my choice of selecting people and gelling with them."

MS: "I am an ambivert for sure... a mixture of both actually... I love to be with my friends... it energizes me actually I am very friendly... but that doesn't mean that I feel low when I am alone. Actually its all based upon the situation... I am a situational introvert I will say... Like I feel shy sometimes when I meet new people or at parties but when I am in a debate or an elocution at school or college, then at that time no one can stop me from being an enthusiast. So yeah, I'll term myself as an ambivert." 

SK: "I think I am an ambivert. Open with you people (friends) and a little introvert with strangers."

These people I interviewed are some of the coolest, most comfortable-being-themselves individuals I've ever met. They exude this natural aura of confidence and yet, they are as mellow as the sunset. These ambiverts are not only fantastic listeners but also real chatterboxes. To sum it up, they are the best people who'd make you feel better when you're down in the dumps! 

The ambiverts that are comfortable within their own skins are individuals who have really carefully analysed their personalities and finally become the best versions of themselves.  

3. B. The 'IDK What I Am Ambiverts' 

KH: "Wat is ambivert? I don't know what I am! :'( :'( " 

SAK The Younger: "My mom says I am an ambivert, reasons I don't know 'cause other people have told me I'm introverted. I'm not always so outgoing." 

And of course, I'm one of the colossal examples of 'IDK What I Am' Ambivert too. 

These ambiverts are people who are judged by extreme levels. Some people say that these ambiverts are out and out extroverts while the others say that they are through and through introverts. 

This, naturally, leads to a hell lot of confusion.

I'm not saying that fitting into this category is a bad thing. It's actually cool to say that there's a lot more you can discover about your personality. 

These ambiverts, what I've observed, are actually moody individuals, not graceful ones like the 'content with my awesomeness' ambiverts. They assess a person and then they decide to open up. If the other person is not interested to talk or exudes negative vibes, these ambiverts aren't interested to talk to them, either. 

In my case, I shut up around such morons because if I do start revealing myself, those negative-vibe-giving-snoots will end up having a perpetually bloody nose and a severely bruised ego. 

3. C. The 'Chameleon' Ambiverts

PR: "I consider myself as an ambivert. My extroverism or introvertism depends upon how close I am with the person." 

RG: At multiple times, I've observed this to be the case. My "vertiness" factor depends upon the person in front of me.

AN: Ambivert (assuming it means both introvert and extrovert) because I can't be extroverted in certain situations, and introverted in some! 

 ND: You cannot be too open and you cannot be too closed. You have to behave according to the situation. Moreover, too much extroversion and introversion isn't good. In fact, it isn't healthy. 

This is the most common form of ambivert because it's the most generic form and it fulfills the generic definition of an ambivert: having traits of both. 

However, these ambiverts are actually chameleons. Unlike the 'comfortable in my own skin' or the 'IDK what I am' ambiverts, these ambiverts are people who literally change themselves utterly based on how the situation demands. 

I'm not saying it's a bad thing. In fact, it's really admirable that they are literally individuals with the most flexible personalities. This, I believe, makes them more adaptable than the rest of the 'verts' and are more emotionally stable. 

3.D. The 'Metamorphosing' Ambiverts 

NG: "Ambivert - in the process of being an extrovert though. I change according to the person I am with like water." 

SAK The Older: "Oh, by the way apparently I am not an introvert. Well I was once upon a time but now I have improved... turns out I'm not that quiet after all... probably college is bringing out the personality who was trying to step out but buried under years of expectations and fear of losing."

These ambiverts, truth be told, are individuals:

a) who were really inward at a point of time. However, after positive forces like change of place, change of people forced them to open up.

b) who are actually ambiverts but want to be a lot more outward.

Putting it simply, these people are the biggest examples of those who wish to change themselves and unleash their inner Beyonce-s. 

Unlike the 'Chameleon' ambiverts, the 'Metamorphosing' ambiverts are individuals who want to completely change their entire personality, instead of simply being fluid like your standard ambivert. From what I've observed, they are people who're striving to be a lot more extroverted. 

In a way it's good that they're trying to be open because everyone likes more open individuals and they are striving really hard to better themselves. Yet, being quiet at times isn't a bad thing either. 

4. The Extremes 

This is the category where the people are 90-99 per cent introverted or extroverted. 

These individuals are the livest examples of the 'Extrovert/Introvert' lists. 

Before, I conclude, let me tell you this tidbit. When I was busy sorting out my answers, I came across this really different answer:

TP: "You know, actually, the ambivert term makes no sense and I am deleting that word from my mind now... people are either by default introverts or extroverts...ambivert is sugarcoating introversion." 

 My answer to this contraction would be this:

Being an introvert truly means you are someone who doesn't prefer sharing their opinions and you work best alone. An ambivert, truth be told, is a person who doesn't mind sharing their opinions and they are okay with working in groups too. It's not 'sugarcoating introversion', but actually is walking a bunch of steps ahead of introversion and taking a few steps behind introversion. 

 MY CONCLUSION: 

Now, after boring you with so many variations and so much rambling, allow me to conclude:

Truth is, in this world, I think a huge chunk of the population consists of ambiverts. 

There lies, however, a fraction of the population that is either a 90 per cent introvert or a 90 percent extrovert. The in-betweens, I've noticed are far more happier in life than the extremes. Because extremist introverts and extroverts are, deep down, extremely lonely individuals and way too vulnerable. The extremist extroverts hide their sadness behind a fake smile and a boisterous attitude while the extremist introverts hide their sadness by clamming themselves down.

To sum it up, these three categories are actually really broad terms because people are far more complex than these wide categories. Sure, these categories, like the zodiac signs, give a generalized perspective of how the person really is, but there are infinitely more facets that a person has in his/her personality. Ambiverts, therefore, are the nearest (so far) examples of how complex people actually are. 

I hope you could fit yourself in a category, though, dear reader! If you didn't, there would be more categories for me to explore! Let me know what you think! :) 

No matter what, as cliched as it may sound, you're phenomenal! 

Another typical quote to conclude! 

Stay awesome as ever,

Much love,

Archie <3

P.S., This post is dedicated to all the eighteen individuals who I bugged, pestered, annoyed and bored with this post. I hope you guys finally realised why I acted so weird on WhatsApp/over the phone when I badgered you with these questions. All of your views were really thought provoking and since it's my ninetieth blogpost and since I crossed 10,000 views a few days ago, I thought: why don't I do this survey/analysis post thingy, so a lot more people's opinions are voiced out, instead of my single, inexperienced one?